Showing posts with label anger and rage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label anger and rage. Show all posts

Friday, 26 May 2017

Donald Trump is a fucking idiot

Donald Trump and Theresa May (the Prime Minister, not the pornstar) at NATO,
behold the dignity of The Donald!
It was bad enough when his administration decided that, yes, they would give all the classified intelligence we'd handed over on the Manchester bomber to the press thus compromising the active investigation and jeopardising all future intelligence co-operation between the UK and US because, frankly, you're meant to be able to trust your allies.

I never expected to empathise with Benjamin Netanyahu but here we bloody are.

Then there was the speech. A normal person, or at least a normal politician, would just lead the moment of silence and launch into the platitudes. To the credit of Trump's handlers, he started well. I wasn't even that shocked when he decided that calling ISIS “losers” was suitable to the dignity of the moment.

No, what had my blood boiling was when Trump finally proved, once and for all, that no tragedy is so great or so distant that it can't be all about him. From the loser comment he segued into a rambling monologue about some of his favourite subjects: how NATO owed him money; unsubtle digs about how his Muslim immigration ban was a good idea and similar measures would have prevented the bombing (the bomber was born and raised in Manchester, so no); and reminiscing about how amazing his speech in Saudi Arabia was.

All this quite aside from trying to rip Emmanuel Macron's arm off when it looked like the French President was trying to avoid a handshake and literally grabbing another NATO leader to shove the man aside because The Donald has to be at the front of the shot, damn it!

He is a child. He is a stupid child who can't even conjure up the simple human decency to lead a moment of silence without finding a way to make it all about him.

Worthless orange shitgibbon. 

Saturday, 10 January 2015

The End Times: Thanquol pre-order chaos

It takes a lot for Games Workshop to piss me off. This is because I acknowledge firstly that there's very little a medium size miniatures business can do to seriously offend me and, secondly, because a lot of things that seem to piss of hobbyists on the internet look to me just like a business being a business. But today...

I'm writing this at half past eight on Friday night after over an hour of standing in Games Workshop waiting for their website to work so I can order the latest End Times book.

There were three of us in the queue, most local gamers having worked out last time that sitting in the pub with their laptop was a better bet than queueing at GW is they wanted the damn book. However, the problem with this was that so many more computers were trying to connect that it crashed the website completely for nearly an hour.

The first guy in the queue got his straight away, which I was glad of because he is a very longstanding Skaven player. I was second in the queue and got mine ordered an hour later after crashes, server errors, 520 errors, 523 errors and the rest. This pisses me off because GW had decided not to allocate any hardback copies of The End Times: Thanquol to stores, they were all going to be put in the stock for pre-order via the website.

The ONLY WAY to order this product didn't work due to bandwidth issues and I find it hard to believe any company with a lick of common sense and in light of the last three near-instant sellouts couldn't anticipate this and hire time on extra servers for one damn day.

I just stood there wondering “Do you guys even want my money?” whilst the staff fielded phone calls from every other store in the country asking if they had a working order point. It is going to be a few fun days coming up to be GW customer services (which I do not feel much sympathy for) and a horrible few days for the in-store staff (for whom I feel immense sympathy because it is so far from their fault but they're the point of contact for most gamers).


Please, GW, sort this shit out. 

Wednesday, 8 January 2014

Coda to previous: Wartune plagiarism goes sci-fi

So it turns the publishers of Wartune have a sci-fi game called Total Domination. That up above is a typical add for it.

Yes, that's a Space Marine. Not a space marine as in “a soldier who fights from a ship but in spaaaaaaace!!!!!” but an actual, honest to goodness Raven Guard Space Marine. Or a Black Consul, I'm not sure. Regardless that is absolutely, definitely a recognisable thing that someone has copyright on. How much more shameless is this going to get before someone sues them for IP theft?


Wankers. 

Tuesday, 7 January 2014

Male feminist rantings: The bleak, existential horror of Wartune

Here are my vital organs, please stab one!
The two reasons I count myself as a feminist:

Reason one: I am, or believe myself to be, a decent human being and so want to treat the other human beings in a decent fashion. As I believe that gender should not be a barrier to this behaviour I classify myself as a feminist.

Reason two: I am a geek and what's more a geek who is mostly straight. Therefore the perception, both inside and outside the geek demographic, that some of our interests are for “men only” kind of pisses me off. It is an exclusionary mindset that does nothing more than create self-fulfilling prophecies:

Women don't buy comics!” Yes, they do, but they're turned away in droves by the big companies ignoring female talent and marketing their female characters as fetish objects.

Women don't play wargames!” Yes, they do, and there would be more of them doing so if the community at large didn't treat them as outsiders or as personifications of the “nerdy girl” fantasy, if they just treated them as (God help us) gamers.

Geeks don't get girls!” Yes, they do, in droves by just being decent human beings around the lady folk. However, if you're going to repeat this bloody stupid sentiment you will look like an entitled dick who thinks a woman should get in bed with you just to show social conscience rather than as a considered and consenting action based on things like attraction, friendship, mutual respect or some other interaction of your actual personalities.

Women don't play computer games!” Again, they do, but when the most iconic female protagonists are marketed purely on their sexual characteristics (Lara Croft, Bayonetta) you are losing more potential female customers than you gain.

It is a well known fact that nothing says "medieval
fantasy setting" quite like a latex bikini
And so we end up, finally, at Wartune: a free browser game whose adverts turn up on any games-based forum you care to name. The image at the top of this post is actually the most restrained one I could find with some simple Google-slinging. Yes, the woman is impractically dressed and you don't need my Red Cross training to notice the sheer number of vital organs and arteries her armour exposes.

Example number two gets “better”, completely dumping any sense of the game's ostensible fantasy setting to have a woman in a bikini (and anyone who thinks it's a Dead Or Alive character is probably right) and a strapline containing one of the worst erection gags I have ever heard and I have seen every episode of Up Pompeii.

So how does this all relate back to my point about the exclusionary aspects of fandom? Example number three:

She's Korean, on her artist's side
Here we have the full panoply of the problem: The character art, as with the last example (and doubtless the first, though I can't identify that one) is plagiarised. This is, I am told, a character from a Korean MMO called Forsaken World. This one says “Adult Gamers Only” twice but some versions of the ad have “Male Gamers Only”. One of the ads even has the strapline “You deserve an orgy.”.

What may not be plain from all this is that the game is not pornographic. Clicking on the link will not take you to dark, sybaritic pleasures of the binary code. Wartune is a Real Time Strategy Role Playing Game. There is some turn-based combat and even, I shit you not, a farming sim mechanic. What is consciously lacking in the player experience are titties of any kind (okay, there may be cow-milking, I didn't go too far in researching this particular aspect).

What this amounts to is a company creating an Age Of Empires-style RTS with some basic JRPG combat mechanics and marketing it through images of scantily clad women. And even worse they don't even go to the trouble of commissioning art of their own scantily clad women but steal them from all over the place. This company has made a conscious decision to lie about its product because expecting of men to follow a link promising them boobies is a surer bet than coming out and announcing a free to play RTS/RPG.

As a man, I am insulted by the idea that quality is unimportant to my consumer experience so long as some primitive sexual reflex is stimulated. Not even satisfied, just stimulated, this company literally thinks it can lead me by the cock towards its substandard product. As a straight(ish) man with quite a few female friends I am embarrassed that this is how the larger culture sees my relationship with them. As a geek whose female friends are by and large also geeks I am enraged that they should be consciously excluded and their custom tacitly declared worthless in favour of mine.

And what pisses me off the most? It bloody works for them! There is no worse aspect than that. These corporate behaviours continue and are repeated throughout the culture only because they produce positive results. That's how capitalism works in practice. If a large enough section of the gaming population looked at those ads and thought “Well, that's a load of sexist shite!” they would disappear but enough people have clicked on them, stayed to play this Age Of Empires knock-off and handed over money for the higher level benefits (and these don't include titties, either, before anyone thinks any element of honesty went into this marketing strategy).

So, yeah, a company has made enough money to maintain a free to play RTS/RPG by betting on male gamers being sexist and easy to please.


Fuck.