If
there's one thing above all others that annoyed me in Fant4stic then
it's the treatment of Sue Storm. Beyond the unconvincing monkey, the
unconvincing tree, the unconvincing characters and the unconvincing
attempts to make me believe actual effort went into making this film,
Sue Storm annoys me.
You
see, I can't deny that Fox had a whole list of great ideas for her.
They just didn't actually do anything with that list. Here is allthe
things that Kate Mara's Sue is according to the film as shown:
She
is a Kosovan orphan.
She
speaks with a US accent but can summon her native accent at will.
She
is Doctor Franklin Storm's adopted daughter.
She
has a talent for spotting patterns.
She
views music in terms that are both mathematical and poetic.
She
uses her “pattern-spotting” talents as a form of psycho-analysis.
Both
she and Johnny have history with Doom.
She
is more academically accomplished and closer to her father than
Johnny.
She
obviously loves her brother.
Neither
her adopted brother or father place any qualifier before calling her
their “sister” or “daughter” in spite of their obviously
different relationships with her.
This
is what is done with these ideas:
Her
Kosovan origins and accent are referenced once in a scene that only
exists to justify Doctor and Johnny Storm being black now. Ditto, the
fact she is adopted.
The
pattern thing, oddly, is never used in conjunction with her being a
scientist. Her job on the teleportation project is making the
environment suits. Even though two scenes involve her operating
complex computer programs, one of which involves her using her
pattern-recognition skills, she is not one of the computer
programmers on the project.
The
poetic speech about patterns in music is only to reinforce the idea
that the hot woman is cooler than Reed, the speccy socially awkward
nerd. Oh, Fox, you and your hilarious stereotypes...
Doom's
feelings for her are never actually addressed in her direct presence.
He just tries to use the force of sheer machismo to scare Reed off in
one scene. Her view on Doom? Never addressed, never even referenced,
not even in the one moment where Doom sort of brings it up to her
when he says he wanted her to be Eve to his Adam on the nightmare
hellhole warpstone planet that gave them their powers.
Sue
and Johnny relate to each other in only two ways: mutual low key
affection or Johnny being outright hostile. There is little middle
ground and nothing that bridges the two emotions. The attitude of the
film makers honestly seems to be “They're siblings, okay?” with
no other explanation needed. The obvious view of Sue being the “good
child” Doctor Storm favours over the less-accomplished Johnny is
brought up once (by Johnny to Doctor Storm, again cutting Sue out of
an emotional storyline that should involve her) but never explored.
No connection is made between the fact that both she and Johnny are
builders of things on the project: she the environment suits and he
the welding on the teleporter itself. Nor is it ever addressed that
she and Johnny are the only two of the five empowered characters who
“switch off” their powers using the properties of their costumes.
Beyond
that, of course, is the fact that she's cut out of the expedition
that gets them their powers, gaining her own as a side effect of the
group's return from the alien/alternate world. Yes, a Fantastic Four
movie in which one of the Fantastic Four is not present for the
actual incident in which they get their powers. What's she off doing
while the others are doing their ill-advised thing? Chasing after
daddy! Good grief. And then the boys get drunk before deciding to
take the teleporter for an unauthorised test fight and, obviously,
Sue couldn't be present for that because she is a good little daddy's
girl.
Let
that be the legacy of this film, folks: Fox has managed the
impossible feat of plunging head first into the Madonna/Whore Complex
in a film with only one female character.
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